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       More about me...

      About Hurricanemobileoil

      posted on Aug 31, 2008

      Where to even begin. Well my wife and I both had pretty good paying jobs. My wife has since had 2 back surgeries and is no longer able to work. Her back problem is only the tip of the iceburg of the problems she has faced in her life. She has been in and out of hospitals starting at 6 yrs old.

       Well here is where the problems begin. I quit my job to start up my own business (a mobile oil change) which I had done a ton of research on before jumping into. Great concept. We come to you at your location. Well I knew it was going to be slow starting out, but I had about $60,000 in my 401k. I started up my business and my wife had to stop working. Well we have a lot of bills between the 2 of us. I figured we would be okay because the business was going to take off and I could always get a part time job as well. Well business has been awful and we have gone through the entire 401k in 7 months. Starting up the business and paying all of our bills with my wife out of work was more then I had bargained for.

       The medical bills are piling up and I CAN NOT have a lapse in our insurance or my wife will not be covered for all the pre-existing conditions she has. She has applied for disabilty, but of coarse was denied. We talked to a lawyer who said, being only 39 and having a degree would hurt her chances of getting the disability. We are trying to appeal it, but this could take years.

       My job search has been going on for 3 months now. I finally landed a job I will be starting in about 2 weeks, but the pay is a joke. Mainly taking it for the benefits before my cobra insurance runs out. We have sold a bunch of our stuff on Craigslist and e-bay already and not sure what we are even going to do about rent that is due tomorrow. Our bank account is in the minus. 

       I feel like a total failure to my wife and our families. This is my fault for starting up this business. Both of our vehicles are about to be repossesed and if we can't get rent, not even sure whats going to happen. We went from about $100,000 a yr to pretty much $0.

       I am not writing this for sympathy or pity. I just needed to get this off my chest and talk about this. I have to much pride to talk to my family. They don't have the money anyway, but I think I am afraid of the told you so's. Her family trusted me to take care of their daughter and I screw everything up. I am a former Marine for Christ sake. I should be able to deal with this. I have found myself having total breakdowns when I know my wife is not around. We will only be married 1 yr Sept 20th.

       I think what is getting us through all this right now is our dogs. We have 2 boxers. Had to put our 3rd one down a couple months ago. At least they bring smiles to our faces everyday.

       I am not looking for handouts, just some advice or maybe someone to talk too.

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      More about: South Carolina, in debt, failure, what to do, Mount Pleasant, SC

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          Comments... (3)

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          rastamanchamp
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          3. rastamanchamp posted on Nov 21, 2008

          It's never as bad as it seems... I know this sounds like rhetoric, but there is always a way out. First things first. Talk to a credit counsellor and talk to your debtors, a lot of times they will lend you some slack if they know that you have a plan to get out of debt... (It's win-win because in the long run it gets them more money). A credit counsellor can help you find ways to ease the payments you are making.

          In terms of paying down your debts, (Start with the debt with the highest interest rate and pay that down first, make only the minimum payments if that is all you can afford.... Then put the money that you were paying on the first debt and apply that plus any extra money that you can toward the next highest debt... continue the cycle till all debts are paid... Then put the money that you were using to pay down debts aside in a high interest account to accumulate interest and bolster your savings. It's a three phase approach that works... Don't loose hope.

           

          Finally, look at EVERYTHING you are spending... Keep track of EVERYTHING you purchase and account for it down to the cent. Look at your purchases over the month and see what you can do without. (Believe me there are a lot of things that anybody can eliminate from their spending providing they are honest with themselves and their partner and look hard enough). Repeat each month until you find yourself having to justify your purchases. This will help you eliminate unnecessary debt and getting yourself further into debt.

           

          I know it sounds like a lot, but take it in little steps and it will work I promise!  

          faithfuld
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          2. faithfuld posted on Sep 26, 2008

          Please, don't consider yourself a failure. Some people would give their leg for at least having a chance trying to do what you attempted to do . If you had not tried to have a business of your own you would have gone all your life thinking I wonder if I would have succeeded having my own business. So you took a chance in life and it didn't work out , well I tell you God has something better stored for you. Afterall, money is not everything, but your wife is worth more than money. She has been through alot and she has a wonderful guy like you that thinks the world of her. As for her disability, she can get it.,   alot of people get the first denial and then they have to appeal it and eventually get it, but having a degree has nothing to do with it. If a person is unable to carry the duties in her job like she was able to do before becoming ill and her physicians medical records, x-rays and surgery records testify to her disability the judge will reopen her case and probably allow for her to get her benefits. Which are in fact our own monies which we have paid into our social security. Take care of your wife and yourself as you both are at the prime of your lives and have time to make it in life. God Bless you both. I'm not that literate in grammar but I hope I made myself clear.

          ricardog
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          1. ricardog posted on Sep 25, 2008

          When people get into problems like this is because they see no problem with there life. They have to see the whole picture not part of it. 

          You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders and if you can all the way up and then down. You should be able to go all the way up again.

          Look, I'm sure you have heard this before but you need to keep a smile on your face and see the good of what has happen in your life. You have a loving wife, 2 dogs and a life that can be fixed. Don't feel or be down on yourself. When you stop that, thing will turn for you. Just keep pushing hard to keep going forward. Life will never lead you somewhere that you can't handle. You can do it. 

          So pick yourself up, brush yourself off and start thinking on how to turn things around. You can do it and it will work.

          You can do it..... 

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